Cow Climbs Five Storeys To Escape Horney Bull

A cow which was not in the mood ambled to the top storey of a Siberian apartment building to escape a bull which was, and had to be led back down by firefighters, authorities said. The cow was discovered bellowing on the top of a stairwell in the five-storey building in the village of Lesogorsk last month, with the probable cause of the cow's distress an amorous bull at the bottom.
"The bull was very loving and had paid excessive attention to the cow during the summer grazing," the Irkutsk regional branch of Russia's Emergency Situations Ministry said in a statement.
"Trying to escape from him, the cow ran into the building and climbed up to the fifth storey," it said.
It took firefighters about three minutes to get the cow downstairs by roping its horns and pulling, according to the statement, which suggested members of the crowd that gathered should have done the job themselves.
"When we arrived there were dozens of people outside the building. There were members of the local administration, police and many bystanders," it quoted fire station shift chief Yevgeny Smirnov as saying.
"In principle, they could have done without us."

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Beer Goggles Get Their Opposite Goggle

<--- Beer Goggles are getting a run for their money!




It's the latest prescription for extreme ultra-Orthodox Jewish men who shun contact with the opposite sex: Glasses that blur their vision, so they don't have to see women they consider to be immodestly dressed.
In an effort to maintain their strictly devout lifestyle, the ultra-Orthodox have separated the sexes on buses, sidewalks and other public spaces in their neighborhoods. Their interpretation of Jewish law forbids contact between men and women who are not married.
Walls in their neighborhoods feature signs exhorting women to wear closed-necked, long-sleeved blouses and long skirts. Extremists have accosted women they consider to have flouted the code.
Now they're trying to keep them out of clear sight altogether.
The ultra-Orthodox community's unofficial "modesty patrols" are selling glasses with special blur-inducing stickers on their lenses. The glasses provide clear vision for up to a few meters so as not to impede movement, but anything beyond that gets blurry — including women. It's not known how many have been sold.

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Dead Man Driving In Car Chase

Las Vegas police chasing a car that appeared to be driving itself say they found a man shot dead inside.
An officer says he saw the Nissan Maxima run a red light about 6 p.m. Sunday near Martin Luther King and Lake Mead boulevards, but it didn't look like anyone was in the driver's seat.
Authorities say the vehicle jumped a median and veered into a landscaped area near a church before it turned back into oncoming traffic and hit another vehicle.
Officers found a man with multiple gunshot wounds slouched in the seat. He was pronounced dead at the scene.
Police tell the Las Vegas Review-Journal the man apparently had his foot on the accelerator after he was shot. Detectives are looking for who's responsible for the killing.

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"I couldn't stop because I was topless!"

Police may hear a lot of creative excuses from people hoping to avoid speeding tickets. But this north Florida woman wins the booby prize.

Mandy Ramsey says she didn't stop for Marion County police because she was topless.
Police say the 35-year-old ran a stop sign and crashed into a tree when a patrol car tried to pull her over.
Ramsey says she was en route to surprise her boyfriend.


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"I need to quit texting because I could die in a car accident."

Chance Bothe, a 21-year-old college student, was headed home when he texted a prophetic message: I need to quit texting because I could die in a car accident.

Seconds later, Bothe plunged off a bridge, then a cliff and ended up in a deep ravine.

Bothe’s father said his son suffered a broken neck, a crushed face, a fractured skull and traumatic brain injuries.
“I said, ‘Call the funeral home. He’ll never make it,’” said Bobby Bothe, Chance’s father. “We lost him three times. They brought him back. He coded three times.”
Six months later, Bothe has recovered about 80 percent. He talked with KHOU-TV’s Kevin Reece on his last day of rehab. That’s where he learned to talk and walk again.
“Yeah, I was text messaging on the phone, flew right off the road,” said Bothe. “I’m very lucky that I’m not gone forever. That I still have things to do on this world.”

Read more HERE

Don't You Dare Call Me "Honey!"

Newington police arrested a man they said became angry when a store clerk called him 'honey' and then punched her in the face.

The unidentified clerk told police that the customer, who was identified as David Wright, 52, of Burgundy Hill Lane in Middletown, questioned the cost of items and when she told him the price she called him, "honey."
The customer told the clerk that if she called him "honey" again, he would punch her in the face.
The clerk then questioned Wright's intentions and that's when she said he reached over the counter and punched her in the face.

Another customer in the store grabbed Wright and threw him out.

Read more HERE

Bull Mounts Man On Cop Car

A bull in the mood for love damaged an Arkansas sheriff's patrol car when it tried to mount a man who was leading the animal across a yard.Authorities said Wednesday that a Faulkner County sheriff's deputy was responding to a call about a bull running loose when he saw the man slapping and trying to guide the bull.
The Log Cabin Democrat reports (http://is.gd/kFYF4D) that as the patrol car drew near, the animal reared up and pinned the man against the vehicle. According to the deputy's report, the bull then "tried to mate with him."
The bull then lost interest and followed a truck down the road.
The patrol car sustained minor damage, though no injuries were reported. The bull's owner says it was the animal's first escape.

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She Hulk Lifts Car Off Her Father!

Lauren's father, Alec, was working on his car, a BMW 525i. The jack slipped and the car fell on top of him. Lauren was on her way out the door when she came upon him, unconscious and crushed.

It happened Saturday on Lincolnshire Court near Old Nuckols Road. 

"As I go to open the garage door I hear a primal scream, like…dial 911!" said Lauren's mother, Liz.

That scream was 22-year-old Lauren discovering her father.

"There was no tire," said Lauren. Seconds later, she did what most would consider unthinkable, she moved a car weighing a ton and a half off her father's body. 

 "I just lifted up kind of right here and just kind of threw it, shoved my body as hard as I could then I came back and dragged him out and started CPR," Lauren said.  "It flashed like, I'm going to lose my dad." His eyes were open, he wasn't responding to me. I knew I had to get his heart beating again and I had to get him breathing."

"She got his heart beating again and got him breathing again," said Lauren's mother. "So, she's it. He gave her life and then he gave her life. I am in awe of her. I am in awe of her. She is the day. She saved the day. I can't even tell you how proud I am of her."

Alec's doctors didn't want him to speak on camera just yet, because he's still in the ICU.  He has several broken ribs, some numbness, and other fractures, but nothing that appears to be permanent damage. 

He also asked us to share this statement: "I'm just so lucky and proud that I have daughters that can perform CPR and have the knowledge to save lives. I think it's an important skill for everyone to know and if it weren't for Lauren I would not be alive today." 

Read more HERE

Man Hides From Police In Septic Tank

To avoid arrest, a man in south Modesto crawled through a small hole in the ground and into a septic tank behind a motel on Ninth Street on Tuesday.

About 8 a.m., Stanislaus County sheriff's deputies were dispatched to the Ninth Street Bridge for a report of a man obstructing traffic, Sgt. Anthony Bejaran said.

They found him several blocks south of the bridge, lying in the parking lot in front of the Arrow Inn.

As the deputies approached, the man got up and ran behind the motel, where they temporarily lost sight of him.

Then one of the deputies noticed a small hole in the ground, next to which was a concrete cover. The hole was no more than 18 inches in diameter, but the man had wriggled his way through it and into the septic tank below.

The opening to the septic tank normally is obscured, and Bejaran believes the man previously pegged it as a hiding space or perhaps even had used it in the past.

"He had to have known it was there," he said. "I can't see that being a spur-of-the-moment decision."

Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Battalion Chief Bryan Hunt estimates that the tank is about 7 feet deep and said the liquid inside it reached the man's shoulders.

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Walmart Madness #40! KY Jelly Theft + Sex In Store

The X-rated encounter Sunday evening resulted in the arrest of Julian Call, 22, and Tina Gianakon, 35, on theft and lewd and lascivious behavior charges, according to the Hutchinson Police Department.


Witnesses told officers that the couple was openly fondling each other in full view of fellow Walmart shoppers (which resulted in the lewd and lascivious charges). Additionally, the pair was accused of shoplifting the sexual lubricant and other items.
Municipal Court complaints filed against Call and Gianakon accuse them of engaging “in sexual intercourse or sodomy with any person or animal with knowledge or reasonable anticipation that the participants are being viewed by another.”
Call and Gianakon--both of whom appeared sober--were briefly booked into the Reno County jail on the misdemeanor counts.

Read more HERE