Monday, September 30, 2013

Rapist Gets The Cooking Pot Treatment

Frank 'Lumpy' Harrison

"Police responded at about 5:30 a.m. Sunday to the Extended Stay America Hotel at 1910 Andover St. for reports of a male covered with blood and cuts on his head.

Harrison had allegedly approached the woman in her hotel room with a knife and attempted to rape her, police said. Harrison would not allow the woman to leave her room, but the woman was able to fight him off with the cooking pot, police said.

- See more at:

A Couple Make Love On Train Tracks. Guess What Happens?

The couple was reported to have left a friend's home in the very early hours on Saturday. They were believed to have been drinking and were probably still intoxicated as they strolled home.
The 41-year-old man who survived the ordeal said that he and his girlfriend were so overcome with their passion for each other that they had to stop to express their love, on the train tracks. This all took place somewhere in Zaporizhzhya, a city in southeastern Ukraine, situated on the banks of the Dnieper River.
Now this act was very spontaneous and romantic, what with the buzz, the cool air of early morning, the warm light of dawn peeking through the dark, night sky. But in the end, it was not a wise move, as a switcher locomotive was destined to cross this same stretch of track at exactly the same time. The train ran them right over the couple whilst they were in the throes of lust, killing the woman in her lover's arms while simultaneously tearing off both of his legs.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Walmart Madness #103! Cross Dressing Old Man Tries To Steal Purse

"The security guard spotted an older gentleman wearing rose blush, cherry red lipstick and dressed as a woman popping off the tags of several items.

He had more than $800 in his wallet but Manuel Rodriguez, 80, was caught trying to steal items and stuff them into a purse that had also been pilfered from a store shelf, according to a Marion County Sheriff's Office report.
The guard followed Rodriguez as he entered the frozen-food department, grabbed an item and walked to the check-out line to pay for it.

The guard cut off his getaway and detained Rodriguez until sheriff's deputies arrived."


School Accountant Steals 3 Million Dollars Over 7 Years By Stuffing It In Her Bra

<--- A cup always wore a D cup. :)

"Police in Rialto, Calif., allege that Judith Oakes, 48, spent the past seven years embezzling as much as $3 million in student lunch money from the school district, and say they have video of the woman stuffing cash into bra before leaving work.

“Obviously she had access to large sums of money and she was able to possess those large sums of money and get them out of the building,” Rialto police Capt. Randy De Anda told CBS-LA News.
Though official charges have yet to be filed, police say that when they went to Oakes’ house to arrest her, they found thousands of dollars in stolen cash.

The Caturday Report! Meet Zoe The Moustache Cat

Follow Zoe on Facebook!  Zoe-the-Moustache-Cat

Not long ago, the Humble Unicorn Guild (HUG) examined the world and noticed that something was missing. Since necessity is the mother of invention, HUG decided to create a lady cat with a moustache whose unconventional beauty, wit and charm would delight the world.

Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?

"Be happy and smile with your entire moustache!"

The Giant Rubber Ducky Finally Comes To America!

Here is the latest in the saga of the gigantic rubber ducky.  The infamous giant rubber duck at last has made it to the United States of America! It's currently floating in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.  And in case you missed the past stories,  here are links to them:


Thursday, September 26, 2013

Giant Hornets Kill 28 People, Injure Hundreds More

Uh,  NOPE!

"Twenty-eight people have died and hundreds have been injured in a wave of attacks by giant hornets in central China, according to reports.

Victims described being chased for hundreds of metres by the creatures and stung as many as 200 times.

Most of the attacks in the past three months were in remote, rural, wooded areas in southern Shaanxi, the province's China Business newspaper reported.

In the city of Ankang alone, 18 people have died from the stings, health official Zhou Yuanhong told Associated Press. People in the cities of Hanzhong and Shangluo have also been injured."

 Read much more HERE

The Great Maple Syrup Heist To Be Set For Hollywood Film

The original Great Maple Syrup Heist story can be found here:

 <--- Jason Segel is happy to play the starring roll in the movie.

"The massive theft of an estimated $18 million worth of maple syrup from a storage facility in Quebec last year is set to become a Hollywood movie.

Sony Pictures has announced plans to make a film based on the theft, with comic actor Jason Segel in line to star.

Seth Gordon, whose last movie was the hit comedy Identity Thief, will direct. Family Guy writer Chris Sheridan is slated to write the script.

The maple syrup heist, or the Great Maple Syrup Caper as it has also been dubbed, took place between 2011 and 2012. Quebec is the world's leading producer of maple syrup, with some estimates that the province produces three-quarters of the world's supply.

Thieves siphoned off the contents of 16,000 45-gallon barrels, some of which was transported to a processing and exporting facility in Kedgwick, N.B., where the theft was eventually discovered.


Coming To America: The Flesh Eating Drug, Krokodil

Krokodil has been around in Russia for quite a while.  Why people continue to use Krokodil,  and why  it is spreading is a mystery to me.  Take a look at this photo of what it can do to you for instance:

There is also a video out there of a krokodil user's ate up leg being amputated with a wire saw.  I think I'll spare you dear readers from posting it here *shudders*.

"Similar to morphine or heroin, krokodil is made by mixing codeine with substances like gasoline, paint thinner, oil or alcohol. That mixture is then injected into a vein, potentially causing an addict's skin to turn greenish, scaly and eventually rot away.

Dr. Frank LoVecchio, co-medical director at Banner Good Samaritan Poison and Drug Information Center in Arizona, told CBS5 that the first two cases of people using the drug have been reported in the state. He declined to comment on the patients' conditions.

"As far as I know, these are the first cases in the United States that are reported," LoVecchio said, adding that the cases are believed to be linked. "So we're extremely frightened."

Read more about it HERE

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Nude Haunted House Opens For Thrill Seekers

Warning!  Your butt may disintegrate into a pixellated parallel dimension

“It’s the first time it’s ever been done anywhere in the world,’’ Shocktoberfest president and owner Patrick Konopelski told “The whole idea is to create this vulnerability and get their defenses down. It can be hard to scare groups, and you usually have to get louder, more chaotic, and more tense, but now if they’re not wearing clothing, it can be more intimate. You can scare with a whisper rather than a scream because people will only huddle so close to one another.”
Konopelski, who has run Shocktoberfest for 22 years, got the idea when he saw his four teenagers watching the Discovery Channel show “Naked and Afraid,” which puts one man and one woman together to survive for 21 days with no food, no water, and no clothes."

Read it all HERE

Blue Skinned Man Dies From Heart Failure

Paul Karason, who became famous after his skin turned permanently blue, died at a Washington hospital Monday. He was 62.

Karason was admitted in the hospital last week after suffering a heart attack. He also had pneumonia and later suffered a severe stroke, his estranged wife, Jo Anna Karason, said Tuesday.

Karason was born a fair-skinned, freckled boy but his skin began turning blue 15 years ago after he contracted a rare medical syndrome known as argyria or silver poisoning from dietary supplements.  He was reportedly using a special silver-based preparation to treat a bad case of dermatitis. He had also been drinking colloidal silver.

Jo Anna Karason said some people started calling him “Papa Smurf” after his skin changed color. His white mane and long beard added to the resemblance.

Doctors Grow A Nose On Mans Forehead

The nose knows!

"The man known as Xiaolian had neglected to seek treatment following an accident in August 2012. An infection set in that corroded the cartilage of his nose, leaving surgeons no option but to find a way to transplant a new one, Reuters reports.

Using a tissue expander on Xiaolian’s forehead, doctors “grew” a new nose on the man by cutting it into the shape of a nose and taking cartilage from his ribs to mold the nose into shape. According to local media, the new nose looks good and doctors plan on performing the transplant surgery soon."

Read more HERE  if you're nosey enough.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

What A Bat That Flies Into A Toads Mouth Looks Like:

The Incredible Bat-toad!

“out of nowhere the bat just flew directly into the mouth of the toad, which almost seemed to be sitting with its mouth wide open.”

Some bats do hunt close to ground level and will even pluck prey from the ground.
Asked by Torres if the toad was able to enjoy its oversized meal, Olaya answered “no” and added that the bat actually got away.

Torres explains: “The toad finally gave up and spat it out. While Olaya at first thought the bat was dead, he said it slowly recovered and was able to fly away. I’m sure it won’t make that mistake again.”

Read much more HERE

Ethics Professor Gropes Sleeping Woman

<--- Photo of the unethical ethicist.

"When the case first called in June, the woman spoke of her horror after waking up mid-flight to find herself being groped.
She said she was "speechless" when "a couple of minutes after I woke up he asked me if I enjoyed it".

Sheriff Graham Buchanan described it as a "squalid" incident after finding the professor, who is also an ordained minister, guilty at Aberdeen Sheriff Court.

He said: "The accused concocted an elaborate fantasy. He has convinced himself now that this is what has happened.

"It's a petty and squalid incident where the accused took advantage for his his own sexual gratification."

Wannenwetsch went on trial facing a charge of sexual assault earlier this year and the case was continued until Monday.

During the hearing Wannenwetsch gave evidence admitting he committed a "moral wrong" by touching the woman on the plane but he denied sexually assaulting her."

 Read much more HERE

Man Shot For Not Putting Onions In Omelette

<--- "You're just lucky you didn't screw up the Cappuccino cornetto, dirtbag"

" Pujari, who the police described as a criminal, ordered an omelette for four of his friends. When they found there were no onions in it, the group became furious.

Egg vendor Deepu Kashyap told them he could not afford to buy onions, which have become expensive over the past few weeks.

Pujari then whipped out a pistol and shot at the vendor.

The victim was rushed to a medical facility.

Inspector General of Police (Agra) Ashutosh Pandey told IANS that the assailants were local criminals with many cases registered against them.

"A case under attempt to murder and extortion has been slapped on them and we are trying to arrest them," the police official said."


Monday, September 23, 2013

Man Strings Up Mouse That Chewed Up His Money

You see the distant flames
They bellow in the night
You fight in all our names
For what we know is right
And when you all get shot
And can not carry on
Though you die
La Resistance lives on

You may get stabbed in the head
With a dagger or sword
You may be burned to death
Or skinned alive or worse
But when they torture you
You will not feel the need to run for
Though you die
La Resistance lives on

"A Palestinian man has retaliated against a mouse that chewed through some of his wages by suspending the animal by its limbs and posting an image on Facebook.

The man, who lives in Gaza but is originally from the city of Hebron in the West Bank, tied the mouse to ropes to avenge the mouse’s actions in sneaking into the Palestinian’s closet and eating 3 banknotes of 200 Israeli Shekels each (Dh200) of the man’s pay.

The man claimed he had just received his weekly salary and had hidden it from view for safety.

His actions come amid extreme and unprecedented economic conditions faced in the Israeli-occupied Palestinian territories, the West Bank and Gaza. The Palestinian National Authority (PNA) has delayed cashing in public worker salaries for several months in the West Bank due to shortages brought about in part by Israeli withholiding of Palestinian funds."


Woman Yells "GUN!" In Crowded Theater After Man Urinates On Boy

The woman seemed to be suffering from some sort of post-traumatic stress disorder, the officer said.

“She was having an episode because of the movie and the emotion in the theater with the lights out,” he said. “She seemed very confused and upset over the whole matter.”

The audience was watching the movie “Prisoners.”

The scuffle involved a man in his 70s who apparently urinated on another patron’s 14-year-old son. Boothby said the teen’s father “took the older gentleman to the ground and held him there.” That dust-up involved yelling and screaming, the spokesman said.

Boothby said it wasn’t clear whether the older man had medical issues or possibly had a few drinks. Officers took him home.

Read more HERE

*Ring Ring* "Hello?" "Someone is dead in your room." *Click*

Police in Sakai City, Osaka are currently investigating a 46-year-old man found hanged in an public housing complex apartment that wasn’t his. The actual owner, a 21-year-old man, has since disappeared. This strange story all started when the young tenant received a phone call from an unidentified man speaking in a Tokyo area dialect that said “someone is dead in your room.”

The young man weighed his options following this creepy call. His options being to rush in to help or stay the hell away. He chose the latter and called his step father asking him what to do. The step father decided to call his wife, the young man’s mother, as a person possibly lay dead in the apartment. The mother then called her daughter. The daughter then called her own husband, the young man’s older brother-in-law. Finally, the brother-in-law and his co-worker decided to go check it out themselves.

They went to the young man’s apartment on the 10th floor of the complex and rang the doorbell. Surprisingly a strange man, believed to be in his 40’s, answered the door. He said in a voice similar to the one in the phone call, “indeed, someone is dead in this room” and gestured for them to enter.
When the men entered the apartment, they saw the shirtless and lifeless body of a man hanging by an electrical cord from a curtain rack. Immediately they called the cops, however, the stranger who had invited them in took the opportunity to escape.

Read more at ROCKET NEWS

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Viagra Overdose Leads To Penis Amputation

<--- WARNING,  this is a bad idea.

"The 66-year-old man from Gigante, whose name has not been released, told a local newspaper that he intentionally overdosed on Viagra to impress his new girlfriend, Colombia Reports reported Wednesday.

However, the penis-enhancing drug caused the man, who said he was a former member of the Gigante municipal council, to experience a constant state of erection for several days, the report said. He then sought medical help.

Doctors in Gigante referred the man to a medical facility in Neiva, where doctors noted that the man's penis was inflamed, fractured and showed signs of gangrene, and opted to amputate to prevent the inflammation and gangrene from spreading to other parts of his body.

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Stolen Cookie Leads To Police Chase, Wrecked Car, And Home Invasion

Wanted For Questioning

"A clerk reported that a young man grabbed a cookie from near the cash register, walked outside and started eating it without paying for it and got into a car with two other young men.

The clerk, who had told the man to pay for the cookie, got the license number of the silver Nissan Altima and reported the minor larceny to police.

About 45 minutes later, Officer Crystal Wilson spotted the vehicle on Cowan Boulevard and tried to stop it. The car turned into the Commons at Cowan Boulevard next to the police station and was driven slowly through a parking lot, police said.

As the car approached the clubhouse area, its three occupants jumped out and began running, police said. They still hadn’t been found as of Thursday.

The car, which had been left running and in gear, drifted over a curb and down and embankment toward an apartment. It crashed into a tree, Bledsoe said, which stopped it from hitting the apartment building.

Wilson secured the vehicle and continued looking for its occupants.

A short time later, a woman ran up to the officer and told her that two men had just run into her apartment. The woman said she and her boyfriend were standing outside when the two men ran by and went up the stairs and through the apartment door, which was open.
The boyfriend confronted the men and told them to leave the home, which they did. They continued running until they were out of sight.


Take The Red Pill: Russian Pill Enhances And Prolongs Drunkenness

Russian scientists have developed a product that can keep a person drunk, Britain’s Daily Telegraph wrote.

The tablet called RU-21 Red was developed in Spirit Sciences, a laboratory based in California but with research facilities in Russia. The same scientists had earlier worked on secret programs for the Kremlin and had made the famous RU-21 product that cures hangovers.

If you take a tablet you need less alcohol to stay drunk, the scientists were quoted by the paper as saying. “RU-21 Red prolongs drunkenness and enhances intoxication,” the company co-founder, Emil Chiabery, born in the ex-Soviet republic of Georgia said.

RU-21, the company’s original product, is sold as a natural dietary supplement in the United States and Britain, the paper wrote. It officially claims to help prevent long-term diseases associated with moderate alcohol intake. But among its ingredients are acids that are natural anti-oxidants and reportedly rid the body of some of the harmful by-products of alcohol breakdown that lead to hangovers.

The Red contains grapevine extracts intended to slow down the oxidation of alcohol and keep the user drunk. “I’m not sure I’m going to market it in the U.S.A. I don’t want it to become a party drug. We are for responsible drinking,” Chiabery said.

Man With Stomach Yeast Infection Brews Beer In His Gut

Doctors found a rare medical condition caused one Texas man to become drunk after eating carbs:

The 3 Million Mile Volvo

Here is an interesting short interview with the owner of a Volvo driven 3,000,000 miles so far.  It has been entered into the Guinness Book Of World Records:

The Giant Rubber Ducky Visits Taiwan!

I've been following the giant rubber ducky for some time now,  here are links to the previous stories if you are interested:


Thousands of people have lined the shores of Taiwan's Kaohsiung's Harbour to welcome the massive, yellow rubber ducky:

Man In Critical Condition After Crashing Moterised Bar Stool. Alcohol May Have Been Involved

One for the road. (

"The man, 62, had just left the Puhoi pub on the recreational vehicle - a go-kart with a bar stool on top - when he fell on Friday afternoon.

He was driving on the road without wearing a helmet. No other vehicles were involved, police say.
The man was airlifted to Auckland City Hospital with serious head injuries.

He was in a critical, but stable condition on Saturday afternoon, a hospital spokeswoman said.
Inspector Mark Fergus on Friday said police were investigating whether alcohol contributed to the crash.

The Caturday Report! Lucky The Kitten Hitches Rides In Car Engine

Lucky Vrooom Vrooom

"A GALWAY kitten with a taste for travel hitched a 365km lift across the Border to make a new life in Co Down – stowing away in the engine of the car.

 t turned out to be Lucky's second attempt at leaving his New Inn home in Co Galway.
The kitten initially opted for an 'engine lift' to Loughrea before developing a taste for the unconventional mode of travel and heading much further afield.

He was discovered by car owner Andrew Bell when he arrived home to Helen's Bay in Co Down on September 9. Just days earlier Andrew had found the same kitten in the engine of his car after travelling the 15km between New Inn and Loughrea.

"I couldn't believe it was the same kitten in my car. I was visiting my girlfriend in New Inn and left at 5am to be back at work in Co Down for 9am. When I arrived home I heard purring and when I opened the bonnet, there it was," he said.

Despite attempts to find the rightful owner of the kitten, no one has come forward. Andrew has now found a new home for Lucky with a friend.


Friday, September 20, 2013

The Great Bra Heist

Now for the latest strange heist:

 Police are investigating the theft of $8,000 worth of bras from a Victoria’s Secret store in Montgomery County.

The incident happened at the Willow Grove Mall Thursday morning.

Abington police say two men entered the store with garbage bags and emptied out drawers full of bras.

Police say they did it in just two minutes.

Police are currently reviewing surveillance footage to aid in their investigation.


Thursday, September 19, 2013

Flying Eagle Cam!

This is awesome!  My only complaint is the video is too short.

Helicopter Rescue For Seagull Trapped On Powerline

A stunning photo of the dramatic rescue

"You could say it was one bird coming to the rescue of another this morning high above the water near the Lesner Bridge.

A seagull, tangled in some power lines, couldn’t free itself and had been stuck there for days.
About 8:40 a.m., a helicopter platform crew swooped in beside the lines and a crew member perched on the edge of the platform grabbed the bird and put it into a container.
Then they flew away together.

The bird was still alive when it was rescued, according to Dominion Virginia Power spokeswoman Bonita Billingsley Harris. She said the bird was handed over to the U.S. Department of AgricultureHERE."

 For more on this story + photos,  go

Pink Labia Dye Gaining Sudden Popularity

Think Pink!

"My New Pink Button (tm) is a temporary dye to restore the youthful pink color back to your labia. There is no other product like it. This patent pending formula was designed by a female certified Paramedical Esthetician after she discovered her own genital color loss. While looking online for a solution she discovered thousands of other women asking the same questions regarding their color loss. After countless searches revealing no solution available and a discussion with her own gynecologist she decided to create her own. Now there is a solution!"

You can order the product at!  Here is the address so you can order it right away:  

Here is a warm and glowing review from a happy My New Pink Button user:

"Ladies, we all know that we are nothing unless we can catch a man and keep him. We also know that the fat, balding, underachieving, middle-aged shlub we married will ditch us in a moment for that man-stealing ho Miss Universe if we aren't superficially perfect at all times. But what to do when we start to look like one of those "normal" women instead of an always-perfect supermodel?

My New Pink Button is the answer! Formulated by a quack manicurist - sorry, I mean a "paramedical esthetician" - My New Pink Button will take off the years, take off the children, and take off the reality! Its patented "natural" "formula" (wink wink) is guaranteed to remove what other, lesser women call "normal vaginal coloration" and replace it with pink perfection! And all this with a minimum of permanent scarring and complete loss of sexual response - but who needs that anyway, sex is for men!

My New Pink Button has never been tested on animals (so if it burns your skin off or causes cancer that's your problem) and contains twenty disposable applicators (so you'll be able to fool him twenty times!).

Remember, girls: when your man comes home after a long, hard day of standing around the water cooler telling dirty jokes and ogling the secretaries, he deserves the hottest, most ultra-conformist woman he can find. You owe it to him to be as superficially perfect as you can! Buy My New Pink Button today!"

Burglar Leaves Court Documents At Scene Of Crime

<--- Sometimes those small little details can really trip you up.

"Andre Antonio Henry, 30, of Brandywine, was sentenced to 18 years behind bars for three burglaries committed in Montgomery County.

 One of the clues that helped detectives link Henry to the burglaries was paperwork from the Washington, DC, court system left behind at the scene of the Silver Spring burglary. The paperwork listed theft charges against Henry, according to court documents."

Read more about it at the PATCH

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Real Life Monster Under The Bed

It sounds like the stuff of nightmares - but Guy Whittall will certainly be checking for 'monsters' underneath his bed, after waking up to find an eight foot crocodile hiding just inches from where he slept.

The 330lbs giant had sneaked into the Humani lodge, Zimbabwe and spent the entire night lying quietly, just fractions beneath an oblivious Mr Whittall.

The beast - a Nile crocodile - had managed to stay hidden for more than eight hours overnight. 

It sounds like the stuff of nightmares - but Guy Whittall will certainly be checking for 'monsters' underneath his bed, after waking up to find an eight foot crocodile hiding just inches from where he slept
It sounds like the stuff of nightmares - but Guy Whittall will certainly be checking for 'monsters' underneath his bed, after waking up to find an eight foot crocodile hiding just inches from where he slept

Boris The Clown Catcher Vows To Catch Creepy UK Clown

See the previous story for more information about the creepy UK clown:

Boris - Clown Catcher Extraordinaire

"He began his search for the Northampton clown last night, but has so far been unsuccessful in his attempts to secure a one-on-one meeting.

And it seems the emergence of the clown catcher has sent the minor celebrity into hiding.
‘I’ll be seeing you all very soon (in the day!),’ the Northampton clown wrote on Facebook. ‘But I’m going to lay low for a bit as I have a big surprise for you all hopefully due at the end of the week!!’"

Lets hope the catcher doesn’t find him first."

Read more about Boris HERE

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Creepy Clown Freaks Out UK Town

Scary clown creeps out locals in English town: If comments left on social media are an accurate gage of popular feeling, residents of Northampton, a town in central England, are overwhelmingly unhappy with the spectre of a sinister-looking clown who has been wandering their streets this past week.

This clown doesn't dance, juggle or ride tiny bicycles—he just stares. And according to one local news report, is terrifying the townsfolk. The creepy anonymous jester was first spotted on Friday the 13th, and spends his evenings unnerving people as he stares eerily at them in the evening. He has been spotted in various parts of Northampton, including Abington and Kingsley.

Don't miss the TomoNews animated video!:

Worlds Tallest Man Saves Dolphins By Reaching Into Their Stomachs

Mongolian herdsman Bao Xishun was called in after the dolphins swallowed plastic used around their pool at an aquarium in Fushun, north-east China. 

Attempts to use instruments failed as the dolphins contracted their stomachs. 

Guinness World Records list Mr Bao, 54, as the world's tallest living man at 2.36m (7ft 8.95in).

Veterinarians turned to Mr Bao after attempts to extract the plastic shards at the aquarium in Fushun, Liaoning Province, had failed. 

Mr Bao was called in after surgical instruments failed

The mammals had lost their appetite and were suffering depression, aquarium officials said.

The heads of the dolphins were held back and towels wrapped around their teeth so Mr Bao could not be bitten.

He then extended his 1.06m-long arm into the mammals' stomachs.

Chen Lujun, manager of Royal Jidi Ocean World, said Mr Bao was successful and the dolphins were "in very good condition now".


Guys Make Beer Flow From Every Faucet In Friends House

These guys had WAY too much fun doing this. :)

"A New Zealand brewery teamed up with a group of friends to rig all of the taps in a man's home to dispense beer instead of water as a prank.

The prank, which was recorded by 14 cameras planted around the target's Auckland home, involved the friends enlisting the help of brewer Tui to reconnect the house's entire plumbing system so the taps would dispense beer instead of water, reported Tuesday.

Monday, September 16, 2013

Bank Robber Leaves His Car Keys At The Bank

Andrew 'Ooopsy' Laviguer

"A seemingly simple mistake helped police catch a suspect they believe pulled off several bank robberies, including two in the Puget Sound region.

On Monday, Andrew Frank Laviguer, 57, robbed the Wells Fargo branch on 11th Avenue in Portland, Ore., police spokesman Sgt. Pete Simpson said. But during the robbery, he apparently left his car keys in the bank.

Since he couldn’t drive away, Simpson said he instead fled into a nearby office building where officers quickly caught up and arrested him."

Walmart Madness #102! Man Fires Multiple Shots Outside Walmart

Should I not'a dun' that Vern?

"Customers in the store said they heard several shots fired.

"I looked up, and there is this guy with his gun in the air, shooting," said one customer.
Investigators said the gunman was identified as Rodney Summers, 43, who claimed someone had stolen his bicycle and he was trying to recover it.

Orange County Sheriff's Office spokesman Jeff Williamson said Summers approached three people outside of the store, pulled a handgun, and fired rounds into the ground and into the air.

Officials said nobody was hit by the gunfire, and Summers was taken into custody shortly after the incident. Deputies said they found Summers already on the ground, with arms out waiting for law enforcement. He told officers he knew what he had done was wrong and foolish.

We Seek The Blood Of 100 Virgins

Unfortunately Mrs. Bathory is unavailable for comment

"The Peking University Cancer Hospital said it needed the blood of 100 female virgins aged from 18 to 24 years old for studies on the human papilloma virus (HPV), which is usually transmitted through sexual contact, the China Daily reported.

Some internet users condemned the request as promoting virginity worship and demeaning to women. "Male virgins are not needed, just females, how is this science?" wrote one user of Sina Weibo, a social media service similar to Twitter and a lively forum for popular opinion.

The hospital defended the call for donors, saying that virgins' blood was less likely to be infected with HPV. "It's in line with international practice to collect female virgins' blood samples, which serve as negative control substances in HPV research, given that the risk of contracting HPV is low among women who have never had sex," the China Daily quoted spokeswoman Guan Jiuping as saying.

See more at:

Cat To Be Launched Into Space

<--- I wonder if the cat's name will be Larry?

"Iran says it is considering sending a persian cat into space as the next animal astronaut after claiming it launched a monkey earlier this year.
The effort is part of Iranian ambitions to send a human into space by 2018, but questions have been raised about the reported successes of the country's animal missions.

Monday's report by the official IRNA news agency quotes the space official Mohammad Ebrahimi as saying the next animal could be the distinctive persian cat, a long-haired, flat-faced breed named after Iran's former name of Persia.
No other details were given.


Sunday, September 15, 2013

Meet Hercules, The 922 Pound Feline

Uh.  Good kitty,  kitty,  kitty..

"Guinness World Records announced the latest edition of its book includes a 922-pound South Carolina liger dubbed the world's largest living feline.

Sara Wilcox, public relations and marketing executive for Guinness World Records North America, said Hercules the Myrtle Beach liger, a hybrid of a lion and a tiger, appears in the 2014 "Guinness Book of World Records" as the world's largest feline, weighing in at 922 pounds and measuring 131 inches long and 49 inches tall at his shoulder, The Sun News (Myrtle Beach) reported Friday.
Hercules lives at the Myrtle Beach Safari wildlife preserve's area known as TIGERS -- The Institute of Greatly Endangered and Rare Species.

"We just knew that the largest living cat probably was the liger," Wilcox said. "We have not measured a liger before ... We are aware of other ligers."

Beaver Butt Secretion Is Good For Baking

Eat My Butt Excretion,  Human!

"Information that beaver bottoms can be a source of vanilla aroma, in the form of Castoreum, have been circulating on the internet recently and the agency has now confirmed that there is substance to the secretions.

"Natural aromas can be extracts from plants, fungi, and in some cases animals. The labelling provisions do not require that the kind of flavour is indicated, with the exception of coffee and quinine," Ulla Beckman Sundh at the agency said.

Vanilla flavour, it has been established, is not only derived from the vanilla bean. It can also come from conifer trees, or indeed from the anal passage of a beaver.

Beckman Sundh however questioned whether the beaver is likely to become a common a source of flavouring for baked goods, sweets, soft drinks and other items.

"As far as I know the beaver is not an animal which is bred, so supply is not that great,"
 she said.

Saturday, September 14, 2013

The Caturday Report! Buddha The Fat Cat Goes On Water Treadmill Regimen

The Meowing Buddha

"Buddha, who weighed 31.4 pounds when his human died, quickly got used to his water treadmill at Stonewater Animal Rehabilitation in Franklin, Tennessee, WKRN reports. He used to weigh more than two healthy cats, but with a strict diet and 21 minutes a day on his weightlifting treadmill, he's lost nearly 5 pounds."

Buddha gets a well deserved catnap. :)

Watch Buddha on the water treadmill!:

Friday, September 13, 2013

Restaurant Offers Free Burritos In Response To Bloody Diarrhea Outbreak

Backside Blasting Bloody Burrito Bomb Blues

Maricopa County, Ariz., officials believe that an E. coli breakout sickened 74 people that ate at Federico's Mexican Food in what became known as the "bloody diarrhea outbreak."

Federico's will offer free burritos in its newly sparkling restaurant. The outbreak only occurred at its Litchfield Park location, which voluntarily closed after word of the sickness spread.
The free burrito promotion falls on Mexican Independence Day.

While Federico's Mexican Food was closed, they brought in the "Queen of Clean," a TV cleaning personality that has been featured on Oprah, to be their "cleaning consultant."
She will be there for her free burrito now that the restaurant is spic and span.

Read more:

Masturbating On Public Beach Not A Crime

I guess he was stuck in the crowd and got bored

A Swedish prosecutor said a court's decision to acquit a man who masturbated on a public beach makes it  "OK to masturbate on the beach."

The 65-year-old man had been charged with sexual assault after he took off his shorts and masturbated at Stockholm's Drevviken beach June 6, but the Sodertorn District Court ruled the man could not be convicted of sexual assault because his masturbation was not directed at a specific person, The reported Thursday.

Prosecutor Olof Vrethammar said he does not plan to appeal the ruling.

Pig Brain Used In Music Video Causes Police Raid

<--- They should have fried that sucker up when they were done,  the whole confrontation could have been avoided.

"Leeds-based indie band Eagulls decided to use a pig's brain in their new video; buying one from a local butcher, before filming it in their flat.

However, after a gas inspector came in and spotted the organ, he alerted the police, presumably believing it to be of human origin. While the band were out, the local force then kicked down the door of the flat, before cordoning it off.

Singer George Mitchell explained, “some guy had come round to sort the gas out ‘cos we hadn’t paid the bill. He’d gone downstairs, seen there was some f*****g brain rotting and called the coppers.”


Thursday, September 12, 2013

Witch Ivy Casts A Fearful Spell Over Town

"The strange, pointy-nosed figure, who wears a conical hat and a billowing cloak, and continuously poses with arms outstretched (apparently casting spells), is being blamed for a series of strange happenings in the town.

Piles of letters inside houses, bins vanishing every Wednesday and milk bottles appearing on doorsteps have locals puzzled.


Frog Gets Blown Sky High By Rocket Launch

"This little guy was obviously startled by the ignition of the Minotaur 5 rocket that launched the LADEE spacecraft last Friday.

We’ve confirmed this image is in fact an actual photo taken by one of NASA’s remote cameras set up for the launch from the Wallops/Mid-Atlantic Regional Spaceport. Wallops spokesman Jeremy Eggers confirms the picture is legitimate and was not altered in any way."

Read more at NBCNEWS